Remembering Zach

My son Zach would have celebrated this coming Saturday as his 30th birthday. My sweet family is coming to celebrate his life and remembrance. We decided to serve his favorite foods. I am looking forward to hearing stories that I have forgotten in the 12 1/2 years that he has been in God’s presence.

One of the things that strikes me is how time has changed my perspective so much. After Zach’s death, I struggled with God and whether I believed He truly existed. Afterall, we believed that God could heal Zach and Zach seemed to have a lot of faith. We stood on the scriptures that so many “faith preachers” stand on. It did not make a difference. We cannot control God. What kind of God would He be if we could? My son Michael once told me and I wanted to end with this. He said it in response to this question I put to him. Do you think God is real? He answered, “mom that’s your head talking. You need to listen to your heart because your heart knows the truth.” I did not doubt or question after that because he was right.

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